How to cope with distressing thoughts in the moment?

Author: Sadhana Singh, Counselling Psychologist  

Editor: EmptyCare Team  

Updated: 2nd December 2022 

Do you sometimes feel like it's very challenging to pull away from flashbacks, unwanted memories, restlessness and negative thoughts and emotions? Exercises known as grounding techniques might assist you in refocusing on the present to help you get rid of anxious thoughts. In almost any circumstance, you can utilise grounding techniques to assist clear your mind of unpleasant emotions, but they're especially beneficial for anxiety.  

What is grounding?  

Simple techniques called "grounding" can help people distance themselves from their emotional suffering (for example, drug cravings, self-harm impulses, anger, sadness). Distraction works by turning attention away from the ego and onto the outside world. The terms "distraction," "centring," "a safe place," "seeing outward," and "healthy detachment" can all be used to describe it. 

Why do we do grounding?  

You need a method of distancing yourself from the situation when you are experiencing intense emotional pain so that you can manage your emotions and remain safe. You cannot possibly use drugs or injure yourself while you are grounded. By "anchoring" you to the here and now and to reality, grounding. Many persons who suffer from PTSD and substance abuse struggle with feeling either too little or too much (overpowering memories and emotions) (numbing and dissociation). By grounding, you achieve equilibrium between the two, becoming aware of reality while also being able to accept it. 

Guidelines for Grounding 

Grounding can be done any time, any place, anywhere and no one must know.  

• Use grounding anytime you encounter a trigger, experience a flashback, dissociate, have a longing for a substance, or your emotional discomfort increases by more than six (on a 0-10 scale). By grounding yourself, you create a safe separation from these unfavourable emotions 
• To stay in the here and now, keep your eyes open, look around the space, and switch on the light. Rate your state of mind before and after to see if it had any effect. Rate your emotional trauma on a scale of 0 to 10 (where 10 denotes "severe suffering") prior to grounding. After that, give it a new rating. Has it fallen? 
• No writing in journals or discussing unfavourable emotions. Instead, engaging with negative emotions, you want to divert attention from them. 
• Consider the present rather than the past or future 
• Be aware that grounding differs from relaxation training. The goal of grounding is to alleviate extremely negative emotions. It is much more active and concentrates on diversion techniques. It is thought to treat PTSD more effectively than relaxation training 

Ways of Grounding or Grounding Techniques that can you use by yourself without being supervised by a professional: Mental Grounding, Physical Grounding and Soothing Grounding  

Mental Grounding  

• Using all your senses, describe your surroundings in detail. For instance, "There is a brown sofa, a wooden showcase against the wall, the showcase has books and plants in it and white walls overall."  
• Describe the texture, colour, smell, shape, sounds and form of various objects around you. Mental grounding can be done anywhere. For instance, if you are at the metro station: "I'll see the metro in minutes. There are 3 women standing next to me and 2 men. The metro will take the route over the river 
• With yourself, play a "categories" game. Try to come up with ideas such as "different breeds of dogs," "pop artists," "states that start with "A," "cars," "TV series," "authors," "sports," "songs," and "Indian cities." 
• Use a metaphor: Change the TV to a nicer show while you glide along on skates away from your discomfort. Imagine a wall serving as a barrier between you and the pain 
• Give a thorough description of a daily routine action. Tell yourself about a dinner you've prepared, for instance, "First I boiled potatoes, then peeled them, added seasonings and herbs..."  
• Make a safety announcement. ‘My name is xyzzy, and I am safe. I'm not in the past; I'm in the present. The day is _________ (23rd Nov) and I'm at _________ (my house) 
• Read something and repeat each word to yourself. Or, to concentrate on the letters rather than the meaning of the words, read each letter backwards 
• Make use of comedy. To jolt yourself out of your melancholy, consider something humorous 
• Say the certain words and their alphabet extremely slowly or count to ten 
• Keep repeating to yourself a favourite phrase (e.g., the lyrics of a song, or a chant) 

Physical Grounding 

• Touch the table, the walls, your clothes, a pen, your keys, and different objects nearby. Take note of the materials, colours, sizes, and textures. Making inferences by contrasting the things you touch:   What colour looks better? What material feels better on your fingertips?  
• As firmly as you can, hold on to your chair 
• Carry a small ground object (such as a rock, clay, ring, piece of cloth, or yarn) in your pocket that you can touch whenever you feel prompted 
• Dip your heels into the earth to figuratively "ground" them! Observe your heels as you do this to feel the tightness there. Become aware of your connection with the earth and gravity 
• Pay attention to your body: the way it sits in the chair, the way your toes wiggle in socks, and the way your back feels against the chair 
• Pay attention to your breathing. Noticing each breath in and breath out. On each inhalation, tell yourself something positive (your favourite colour, a word that makes you feel comfortable or easy, etc.) 
• Extend your body. Roll your head around while extending your fingers, arms, or legs as far as you can 
• Move slowly, focusing on each step, and uttering "left" and "right" as you go. Consume something. To yourself, elaborate on the flavours 

Soothing Grounding  

• Say kind things as if you were conversing with a little child. "You are a good person going through a difficult moment, for instance. You'll overcome this 
• Consider your favourites. Consider your preferred colour, animal, season, dish, hour of the day, or TV show 
• Think of the individuals you value (e.g., your children; and look at photographs of them) 
• Keep in mind the words of a song, saying, or poetry that makes you feel better (e.g.. a chant, lyrics of a song, quotes) 
• Identify a safe place. Describe a location that you find to be particularly calming (maybe the beach, the mountains, or a favourite room); pay attention to all the sounds, colours, shapes, objects, and textures in that location 
• State your coping strategy: “I'm capable of handling it, and this emotion will pass.” 
• Plan a safe reward for yourself, like a candy bar, a great meal, or a warm bath 
• Consider the upcoming week's events that you are most looking forward to. Possibly spending time with a friend or seeing a movie 

What if grounding doesn’t work for you? 

• Make up your own grounding techniques. Any strategy you devise might be far more valuable than those you've read about here because it's yours  
• Practice as frequently as you can. Even if you don't "need" it, just so you can memorise it 
• Practice more quickly. You can focus on the outer world more easily as you pick up the pace 
• Begin grounding as soon as a bad mood cycle begins. Start as soon as the want for the substance first appears or as soon as the first flashback appears 
• Consider grounding for a very long period (20-30 minutes). Additionally, keep repeating 
• Try to determine whether "physical" or "mental" or "soothing" grounding works better for you 

You can use grounding strategies as effective coping mechanisms when you are faced with distressing thought. A therapist might be able to help you if using grounding techniques is proving difficult for you. 

Additionally, it's crucial to seek therapy assistance so you can deal with the underlying causes of your concerns. If you don't currently have a therapist, you can check out our qualified therapists.